Guest Post - All About Tom

Monday, June 18, 2012

Hi there readers!  Tom asked me yesterday if he could write a guest post to introduce himself to you all since I mention him a lot.  I figured it might be fun, so I gave him the green light.  What resulted is a surprisingly personal, very introspective post (that I think was probably pretty therapeutic for him to write).  Enjoy! -Alex





Greetings, Good-Girls Gone Wives!

I'm Tom.  I'm that guy who Alex calls her "husband".  I guess, according to the state of Indiana, it IS a legal title.  Am I a good girl gone husband?

Alex talks about me a lot, so I figure I'd let you gals (I'm assuming most of you are of the menstrual variety) get to know me better.

MY PAST
I'm a 24-year-old white male, born in Roachdale, Indiana (home of the world kind-of-famous Roach Race).  I enjoy To Catch A Predator, steak, and bad jokes.  I'm husband to Alex and daddy to Archibald Simpson Green, who is my favorite puppy in the world. The little guy has survived so much and never lets it get to him.  He gets happier every day, which is something I admire greatly.  In a way, he's my hero.  More on that in a bit.

I'm a college graduate, having escaped Indiana's Vincennes University as a broadcasting major in 2009.  I use the phrase "escape", as you couldn't ask for an environment that stifled creativity in a worse way.  For most of my run there, I genuinely felt as if I was getting my Associate's degree in how to be an angry, out-of-date curmudgeon.  It takes a talented individual to take two groups a year of bright-eyed young minds and beat the enthusiasm out of them, crush their spirits, and push a small group of worn-out, burnt-out young adults, who hate the industry they got their degrees in, out into the workforce.

I'm not painting every professor I ran into at Vincennes with the same brush, as there were a few incredibly insightful, selfless professors I had the honor of learning under and being mentored by.  But for the most part, the university was great at finding older, unrelatable instructors who once worked in the industry and had to take teaching jobs for one reason or another; this left them to spread their disillusionment and bitterness to groups of young minds who could be capable of achieving great things...most of whom either drop out of the program quickly or never work in broadcasting due to the awful taste that the program leaves in your mouth.

But even if there had been this great pool of positive energy and encouragement that the program and its leaders nurtured, I still feel as if I was robbed of a real education, as almost every bit of the program was completely and utterly outdated.  I understand that we have to learn about the struggles of the past to gain the basics of today, but a college broadcasting program teaching linear editing (pretty much the old reel-to-reel style cutting that no real media outlet would be caught dead using now) in 2009 is ridiculous.  I also got a note on a paper I wrote about the evolution and popularity of podcasting saying "Way to make us radio guys look like (expletive); the internet fad will be dead in six months".  That was written in the fall of 2008 by someone being paid to teach the future broadcasting minds of our country.

So here I am in 2012, stuck with a degree that legitimizes me to a degree, but one that I can't (and really don't want to) follow through on in the way that most graduates of my school do.  I've found a lot of classmates and graduates of the school on LinkedIn recently, and down the line, they're either working a boring, white-bread job at a regional station that they'll probably stay at forever or they're out of the industry.  There's nothing wrong with that, but it's just proof that the things I went through at that school tend to beat the passion out of most who run through that gauntlet.  I strive to be creative.  Going to a job, wearing the same ol' polo shirt or tie, and clocking in my hours near the water cooler just isn't my idea of a fulfilling life.  It's literally amongst my worst fears; the few nightmares I can remember having in my adult years thus far have revolved around me either working a regular day job and/or being a middling regional television/radio employee who gets stuck being an outdated local yokel for the rest of my life.


CREATIVITY

Creativity as a trait is the core of my being.  Not in a "I'm a 14-year-old who paints my nails black and cries over Slipknot songs" (or whatever kids do these days) way, but in such a way where, if I go a day without making progress in a creative way, I feel legitimately terrible about myself.  The evolution of the human mind is something that intrigues me greatly and I think about often.  Constant change and evolution is something I think we need to all strive for as people and it often disappoints me when talented, incredible people just settle for the status quo.

On top of my own creativity, I like to encourage Alex's often.  I think she's done some really cool things with this blog thus far and her enthusiasm for it makes me really excited about its future.  Being able to find someone passionate about creativity like she is makes me a lucky fellow. (Note from Alex: Awwww!!!!)

In terms of what venues I use to be creative, I'm currently the editor and social media coordinator of a popular retro gaming/humor series on Youtube called Joe Gagne's Funtime Arcade (of which you can find all thirty episodes we've recorded here).  It's probably the most successful creative venture I've been able to work on, in terms of popularity and fanbase.  It also allows me to scratch my own funny bone, as my partner Joe gives me the freedom to sculpt the image how I see fit after he's done writing the words and recording the voiceover for each episode.  Some jokes really bomb (we had a gag on our most recent episode that was met with an awful rejection), but the opportunity to push that part of my creative being to the masses is one I greatly cherish.

As well, I work as the creative advisor, social media coordinator, online media editor & producer, and all-around sweetheart for the School of Roc, a local pro wrestling group that I've been beyond lucky to work with (in that you've never met a group of young artists more willing to do whatever it takes to further a larger brand than themselves).

I've also done audio podcasts and I do freelance editing work if I can get it.  I feel like I'm listing my resume; if you really want to actually read it (or know someone who could get a me a decent job!) go to my LinkedIn profile.

FEARS AND DEPRESSION

I left in that part about me getting a decent job because, well...what I do right now doesn't pay well.  Both major projects I'm working on now have the potential of growing and becoming something that I could use to gain a decent livelihood.  The idea of being self-made and profiting off of my passion and entrepreneurial skills is the dream I chase on a daily basis.  But, it also scares me to no end that at any time, my partners in either venture could decide to bail out and I'd be left with a giant pile of time spent and nothing to show for it.  If I were Indiana Jones, that single vulnerability is a boulder that I run from daily.  I realize the odds are incredibly against me getting to where I want to be in life, and although I'm either brave or stupid in that I keep chasing, it has left my emotional state a complete wreck a lot of the time.

I deal with depression on a daily basis.  Some days are better than others, but when it's bad, I become the ugliest, meanest person you could ever meet.  I say things I'm ashamed of; I do things I constantly wish I could erase.  I'm a much worse person than Alex deserves when I drop down to my lowest depths.  It's this dreary, gross hurricane of emotions that I wish no one ever had to deal with.  I get to a point where I don't want to exist.  Luckily, I've never acted on it,and I don't think I'll ever get to the point where I will.  I think I talk a tough act, but I'm too introspective to actually follow through and think about the consequences that would come with actually ending my own life.

My trigger is often how my efforts to accomplish my dreams aren't paying off in big piles of money and I'm not the best financial supporter of our family.  I get to thinking about how if (insert person or entity here) is somehow doing better at life than I am, that I must be incredibly untalented and wasting my time trying to make of life what I want it.  The fear of the fact that my destination is an ordinary life and making no major impact on the planet before I leave it has made me want to leave it quicker.

Our dog Archie is my hero, like I said, because he can get happy at the drop of a penny.  He just needs to see someone he loves, or hear the noise of a door opening, or even see a chew toy, and he's happier than any person I've ever met.  I'd almost kill to have his overabundance of joy for one day.  The little bugger has so much love in his little heart and I'm privileged that part of it is for his dad.

What brings me out of that point of despair and has caused me to fortunately not follow through with any attempts of eliminating myself from the equation?

HOPES AND WISHES

I think, much more often than about how I'm not doing right by Alex, about how sooner than later, our family of three (Alex, Archie and me) will grow into a family of four, then five, and so on.  It's the hope of a future where I can be someone's hero.  It's the hope of a future where I can help mold a young mind, share what I know, and teach a youngster the vital things to know in life.

It's the hope of a future where I can be a dad.

I think about holding our first baby for the first time a lot.  It's going to be the best moment of my life, and it's something I anticipate daily.  Obviously, the screaming and crying in the middle of the night or any attitude our kids will eventually throw our way won't be incredibly fun to deal with, but those are small potholes compared to the amazing responsibilities and joys that will come with fatherhood. (Note from Alex: I cried. Seriously.)

I love kids in general.  Often at family get-togethers, I go hang out with the kids and play tackling dummy so they can let their energy out without destroying anything.  I love hanging out with my 1-year-old baby nephew Avery, as he's just at the age where he's getting his own personality, and I adore seeing it develop more and more every time I see him.  Children keep the spark within me glowing.

I don't think Alex has any idea how thrilled I am that she's going to be the mother of my kids.  She's going to be a tremendous mom; she's such a caring individual with so much love for people in general.  A major reason why I wanted to marry her and why I love her so much is her passion towards children and wanting to raise them.  She wants to be a mom just as much, if not more, than I want to be a dad.  Her passion for wanting to expand our family knows no bounds and ensures me daily that she'll be an awesome mommy for little Gonzo (you all should probably tweet her to let her know that Gonzo is a great name for a boy!). (Note from Alex: Okay, I bawled.  Also, this is not a pregnancy announcement.  Andplusalso, Gonzo is NOT a good name for a baby).

Parenthood can't get here fast enough; I think we're going to rock its socks off.

CONCLUSION

I want to thank you all so much for being such a supportive audience for Alex as Good Girl Gone Wife grows and prospers.  She puts an incredible amount of work in it, and, though I don't know a lot about this "do it yourself" crafty stuff, from what I do know, she delivers a lot of quality posts.

Also, I want to thank you all for reading through that big wall of text.  I typed a lot of words.  I mean, a LOT of words.  I figured I'd introduce myself to you all since Alex brings me up a lot.  Hopefully it will bring you closer into our little world and help you relate to her posts better.

As Alex could tell you, I love social media and keeping myself relevant to the world by using it as a tool often.  Follow me on the Twitter machine at @NotThatTomGreen and find me on Facebook at facebook.com/NotThatTomGreen.

Also, support Good Girl Gone Wife.  Click the button below this post to vote for her blog and bump it up a bit.  Spread the word to your friends and let them know how awesome Alex Green is.  And most importantly, read Good Girl Gone Wife every day and be a supportive audience as Alex grows as an artist, a writer, and a person.

Thank you all very much!  Keep being wives...who were once good girls. But then you gone...wife.  Yeah!

-Tom

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6 comments

  1. As one of your non-wife readers... I enjoyed your post. You guys are a damn cute couple.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tom says 'Thank you! Enjoy the burrito!'

      He's such a dork.

      Delete
  2. Ummmm, hello! This is the cutest post ever! That was very brave of him to talk about his depression so openly, I know that is a hard thing to do. Looks like you've got a keeper ;)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Awwwww. I'm sorry I missed this when it originally went up. Very sweet of him to a) want to contribute to the blog and b) share so much of himself. It's fantastic that he is so passionate about both his dreams and fatherhood. I'm touched.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree.

      I think I got a good one :)

      Delete

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